random crack (?) pairing fics
by wehihihihi
Summary: Yeah...it's what the title says . . Fics about pairings that probably only a few people support I mean seriously uhh...R&R?


**APPLE X CATERPILLAR IS BEST SHIP**

**DOWN WITH YOUR ETIHW X KCALB AND WODAHS X GRORA**

**APPLE X CATERPILLAR OTP FTW FOREVER**

***pls dun kill me am (probably) only joking***

* * *

apple was just sitting in a basket with the others. He did not know what to feel as he was being brought on an adventure and he had always been on a tree since he was born but he was always told by his mother tree that being brought on an adventure is never good and only bad things can come from it. His mother tree also told him that no apple has returned from an adventure alive. apple decided he felt uneasy about it. Maybe anxious, he can't really tell. He's an apple for fuck's sake.

Somehow he managed to see the person carrying the basket he was in. It was a green haired girl with a hat and a horn and oh yeaah demon yeah well yeah. In front there was this blonde girl with a hat and she looked like she was on her period but apple didn't know if she hit puberty or whut cuz he just an apple you idiots and she has a grey hat and two white wings and OHH YEAAH angel "Damn I forgot about the angel demon stuff" apple thought. He really needed to brush up on these kinds of shit. Well on with the story, chaps.

apple couldn't really tell, but from what he knew, the angel and the demon were talking. He no got ears so he don't really know. Then the two people human demon angel whatever turned around as if they heard something. Then they talk more and went to where the thing presumably came from. On their journey there, apple's two best friends ApPlE and aPpLe were dropped. apple felt sad and yet he wished he could be dropped too. Since he heard that demons and angels ate apples, he felt worried that might be his fate.

When the angel and demon stopped walking, apple saw another angel and another demon (well at least that was what he thinks he saw; he can't tell for sure). One had weird pink hair which looks like it doubles as her wings? Another had a green hat and brown hair and she looks like the kind of "aah don't plees onee sama" girl. so moe.

The same moment he saw moe girl, he met caterpillar. She was trapped in a cage, with at least 11928203948597976947921791810190275758695857392 other caterpillars. He felt some sort of weird sensation inside him. He felt like he wanted to be with that caterpillar, forever.

He wanted to rescue caterpillar, maybe confess his love, and maybe they could, oh, I don't know, elope together and run off into the sunset, feeling carefree. Then and there, apple would propose to caterpillar. Maybe she'd say yes, and they would get married, and crossbreed and they'd have two kids, and they'd be a happy family and...

apple soon snapped out of it. He decided that fantasizing won't do him and his future any good. He started to think of a plan to save caterpillar. Although he can't move. That was the problem.

He ended up thinking for half an hour. It seems the demon carrying the basket he was in and the other angel (not the moe one) collecting caterpillars. "Oh dear, what if, after they're done, they're gonna take me away from caterpillar?" was what apple thought. He had to think of a plan, fast. Although it seems that the collecting process is going quite slowly, seeing that they collected just two caterpillars in the last 30 minutes*****.

During the next 30 minutes, the collecting process suddenly sped up, as the demon and angel have collected about 22 caterpillars already. apple could not believe it. "How can these fucking idiots suddenly get so fast?"apple thought. "Did they take steroids or something?"

The two girls then went on and talked to their friends (at least apple thinks they're talking) and the pink haired one zoomed up. apple would normally not care, but there was something he can't ignore. She took the cage, and caterpillar, with her.

apple was fuming. That little bitch took his loved one away. He wanted to do something, but he couldn't move so he can't. He wanted to cry because he couldn't do anything, because he realised that caterpillar probably doesn't know he even exists! "Even if I managed to successfully let her out, she would probably just thank me and be on her merry way. She probably won't reciprocate my feelings even if I confessed!" thought apple. Now he really wanted to get eaten.

After the moe angel ran at the speed of light, the other demon and angel went on their way. He hoped his life as a fucking apple would end soon.

He crossed his non-existing apple fingers and hoped to feel a big part of him being taken away, so that he would die of oxidization•.

But instead, he fell right out of the fucking basket. He landed in the middle of the path that connected the place where apples will likely die to his home. Unable to move, he bit his invisible apple lip to stop the apple tears (that are not visible) from flowing out of his apple eyes (that probably don't exist). He was forced to stay there, for god**" **knows how long, thinking of the one he truly loves; caterpillar.

* * *

At Yosafire's house...

* * *

"So, how was it, guys?" Yosafire asked the crowd (that consisted of, like, five people) in front of her.

"Umm...well..." Macarona didn't want to hurt her friend's feelings, but that was pretty bad. "W-well...I guess there's still room for improvement?"

"You shoulda had some eating action there!" Rawberry said while clapping. "Still, you get an applause because I sorta got a cameo in there!"

"I ask you to go get apples and this is what you think of..." Dialo sighed. Chelan pet her head because it's kawaii desu.

"You're not going to publish that, are you?" was Froze's reaction. "Sorry to say but it sucked."

"Y-you guys! Seriously?" Yosafire crossed her arms. "Next story I'll show you I'm really a naturally talented author!"

"Sure you are." Froze said, as she left. The others also left after waving or something because if they didn't it would be rude. I think.

When everybody left, Yosafire threw the book that contained her story out the window**\- **and sat on her bed.

"Fucking hell. Some friends I have."

* * *

**A/N:if anyone reads this I will burst into laughing tears my gosh**

**~there probably wasn't a basket but how else were you supposed to carry 99 apples :|**

***maybe it took so long because the player went for a toilet break? And that time he was constipated? 8D**

**•stupidest thing I have ever written ._.**

**"At that moment, Etihw coughed.**

**-Some hobo caught the book when it fell out the window and decided to use all the money he had to send it to a publisher. Since the whole thing was written in pencil, he just used a random eraser he found to erase the original name and put "HoeBoe" in its place as a pen name before publishing the book. The book was a big hit, and sold for millions, therefore making the hobo rich. You can find the book in stores today! Just look for the book "Capplepillar" (he changed the title too) by HoeBoe!**


End file.
